I’m Not Gay, But…
If you walk into my office and turn hard to the right, you’ll see some pictures on my bookshelves. One of those pictures shows me with someone you likely wouldn’t have recognized until recently.
Oh, there it is: a picture of me arm and arm with the then relatively under-known President of the 30-million-member National Association of Evangelicals, and Senior Pastor of a 15,000-member church in Colorado. We were both smiling, brimmingly.
Now if you follow the news, you know who I was arm and arm with: None other than the now-famous/infamous Ted Haggard.
I’m not gay.
But I do love Ted Haggard. When news broke of his sexual misconduct exposed through a politically-motivated male prostitute, I was crushed, and yet I must admit, one of my first personal Pharisaical questions was: Should I take the picture off my bookshelf? Was Ted still worthy to consume valuable real estate on my bookshelf? Sure, it was never a question before. But now?
Then I thought about my arm—you know—the wholesome one around Ted. Is even my arm any more “wholesome” than Ted’s, or Ted’s accusers’, or Barney Frank’s or George Bush’s or Bill Clinton’s or Billy Graham’s? Does anyone, anywhere, have truly wholesome arms? Or hands? Or brain? Or heart?
Seriously, I’m not gay.
But here’s what I’ve learned, not just from Ted’s failures, but from mine: (1) You likely will get more “famous” for the bad you do than for the good you do; and, (2) way down deep, you really aren’t any better than Ted.
So, for now, my picture with Ted stays. Unless you can offer any really compelling reason it shouldn’t. I think it deserves real estate on my precious bookshelf—as a monument to grace, mercy, and compassion for people with arms different than mine, but not unlike mine.
Did I mention I’m not gay? But for all my attempts at imitating Jesus, I am still a crappy sinner in need of the God of James, who declares: “Mercy triumphs over judgment.” Is this your attitude? Or are your arms, hands, brain, heart, any better than Ted’s?
Mrs Ren wrote:
Don’t actions speak louder than words? Really, if you don’t practice what you preach…what’s the point? I hope my actions are better than Ted’s.
Posted on 22-Nov-06 at 10:21 pm | Permalink
Sam wrote:
Sure, we have all done wrong at some point or another, but I have some news for you:
You are better than Pastor Ted.
Unless you lead a nationwide campaign of intollerance against the very group you belong to,
You are better than Pastor Ted.
It’s time to realise that it’s not about the prostitution, or the meth. It’s about hypocracy and bigotry.
I’m sorry your friend is a homosexual, and I believe that you’re not gay. The first or second time you told me, I wasn’t sure, but after the third time, _that’s_ when I believed you. And even if you were gay,
You’re still better than Pastor Ted.
Posted on 23-Nov-06 at 3:24 pm | Permalink
Mark Scott wrote:
Great points all! I love thoughtful dialog like these comments. I love reading and learning from other perspectives.
One of the things that this situation shows me is: the harder the line, the harder the fall. Ted drew a hard line on something that he himself struggled with. Although, I think many people do this; I can be against something, though I’m capable of it. Like, I’m against adultery. I think it’s a bad idea. But that doesn’t make incapable of it.
This is why I choose grace, mercy, and forgiveness for people like Ted — even if his sin is hypocrisy (which seems to be the most popular sin to smack down in our culture; it’s just so easy).
I’m against hypocrisy too. I think it’s a bad idea. But it’s not unpardonable or beyond the reach of mercy and forgiveness. In fact, if I had my choice between falling into hypocrisy or falling into adultery, I’d pick hypocrisy any day. My wife is happy about this.
Have a great Thanksgiving!
Posted on 23-Nov-06 at 11:36 pm | Permalink
NBEHTM wrote:
The presence of his picture on the bookshelf revolves around why it is there. This is your preference. Why is the photo valuable to you? Because of the relationship you had/have? Is it because of what he represents? The conversations that result?
Personally I’m not a fan of the man, nor do I have any relationship with him. In my case he probably would have never made it to the shelf.
2 cents.
Posted on 01-Dec-06 at 12:04 am | Permalink